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Body Image, Self Care

Cultivating Positive Body Image

April 28, 2014 By Robyn 23 Comments

Good morning!

Life is a bit all over the place since I’m in between two apartments right now and my internet has been whacky but I’m hoping to be all settled by Wednesday!

I hope you had a wonderful, restful and relaxing weekend!

As summer approaches and we begin to pull out summer clothes and bathing suits I think it’s easy [I know it is for me!] for negative body image thoughts to creep in. Even if we’re not even expecting them, all of a sudden they’ve seeped into our heads. Negative body image can be one of the most life-sucking things and holds us back from being who we were fully created to be.

Growing up I had pretty good body image and throughout college I did as well, but as my body has changed since graduating college, I’ve found that negative body image thoughts had crept back. And I didn’t like that at all. But over the past couple years, there a few things that have helped me develop positive body image. And although it’s always a work in progress, fully embracing who the Lord created me to be has brought so much freedom.

Because we are all fearfully and wonderfully made. And we are all created perfectly in His image. Down to every freckle and crevice of our body.

I began investing in relationships with others. Instead of focusing on the quantity of friendships and hanging out in big groups all the time, I began focusing on the quality of my friendships. And really being intentional and spending lots of quality time with those friends that were life-giving and filled me up. And the more I invested in relationships, the more I began to focus on the really important things in life like spending time with those I love, instead of what I looked like.

That goes along with number two. As I focused on investing time with others, I also started focusing on loving others better. And I found the more I focused on loving others well and serving others and investing my time in other people, the more I loved myself. Because there is so much joy and freedom in thinking of yourself less. The more you love and serve others, the less time you have to spend thinking about yourself. If you think about it, being so critical of our bodies is actually us being wrapped up in our own egos. I read a book called The Freedom of Self Forgetfulness by Tim Keller on my way to Nicaragua last fall and it completely changed the way I viewed my body.

Thirdly, I broke up with the scale.
The scale does absolutely nothing for positive body image. You are not a number, I am not a number and we should never identify ourselves with a number. I use to weigh myself weekly or bi-weekly in college as a “check-in” and then off and on when I moved to Charlottesville. And then I just stopped weighing myself because I found that the number was affecting my mood and how I measured my worth. I was simply wanting to maintain my weight, but if it was down one pound from two weeks earlier, I felt a sense of pride. And if it was up a couple pounds I felt bummed, like I was gaining or something. Our weight fluctuates from SO many things. I realized this was not healthy at all and I hated identifying with a number. So I stopped. I couldn’t tell you how much I weigh and I have no desire to know. Stop weighing yourself, you’ll never feel more freedom and you’ll wonder why you didn’t do it sooner.

Number four. I accepted that my mid-twenties body is not the same as my 20 year old body and it probably never will be. And that’s OKAY. Our bodies will continue to change and change and change and I want to love my body at the current place it’s in right now. I don’t want to live every day in envy of my younger self. That’s silly. My body won’t be the same today as it is when I hopefully carry a child one day or when I’m 30 or 40. And I think that’s really beautiful. Embrace the skin you’re in right now, it’ll carry you through so many precious years and sweet times.

The fifth thing I know to be true is that who we are is not reflected in our flesh.
Who we are is found in our hearts and within our souls. We don’t develop friendships, fall in love, laugh, find joy and soak up life with our skin or the size of our waist or with the firmness of our thighs. We do these things with our hearts. People don’t want to be around you because of how you look. They don’t care about your pant size. People want to be around you for YOU. Your heart and soul. Your joy and humor and love and caring heart and spontaneity and boldness and courage and so many other things.

Lastly, I stopped viewing exercise as formal.
I’m a cardio junkie and runner and there is nothing more satisfying than a long run on an early Saturday morning with all my running buddies. But exercise does not have to be that intense or planned or intentional to be exercise. I don’t have to end my workout drenched in sweat or have my heart rate high for something to “count.” I began to see exercise as really any movement at anytime, done anywhere. And I began to love what I call, passive exercise. Like when you go on a long walk with a friend or a spontaneous hike or you’re moving from one apartment to another and carrying boxes up and down stairs. Exercise doesn’t have to be planned or intentional. And this change in thought allowed me to focus on what my super wise friend Whitney calls, function over form. To focus on what our bodies can do, not on what they look like.

Embrace the body you’ve got, it’s perfect.
And it’s going to carry you through so many joyful times and hard times and life adventures.
And it deserves to be loved as much as we love others.


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A non-diet dietitian and nurse practitioner helping women find peace with food, accept their natural body size and heal from hormonal issues and period problems.

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I have yet to experience postpartum myself, but I've had many clients and readers that have been through that season of life. Or perhaps you are currently living through the postpartum period. Every woman's body is different, therefore every woman's experience after giving birth will be different. What works for one woman, might not work for the next. While one woman might go through postpartum and adjust to newborn life quiet seamlessly, another woman might find it much more difficult. She might need the support of medication, therapy, extra help and many other things. One way is not better than the other - they are simply two different ways of navigating the postpartum period. I hope this post helps you better care for yourself, whatever that means for you. There's no right or wrong way to care for yourself as a mom or your new baby.

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We veered from our usual Friday night homemade piz We veered from our usual Friday night homemade pizza (minus the dough, we leave that to @albemarlebakingco) because we are eating pizza tomorrow with some friends - instead I called my mom and asked her how she makes her chicken fingers and we fried up a big ole batch of chicken nugs 🙌🏻🤤 along with a sheet pan full of sweet potato fries and a simple arugula salad dressed with parmesean, olive oil and s&p. Oh and my moms honey mustard recipe for dipping. It’s SO DANG GOOD.  Over the past 6ish months we’ve been practicing (and practicing and practicing bc it doesn’t come naturally) unplugging from technology and slowing down and resting and just being for one day a week. Some call it Shabbat. Some call it Sabbath. Maybe you call it something different. All I know is IT IS SO GOOD FOR MY WEARY SOUL and the day I look forward to ALL WEEK. Sundown on Friday to sundown Saturday. Nothing but rest. For us that means hiking (or something outside) and napping and reading and being with friends and eating really good food. And drinking some really good wine or craft beer. Sometimes whiskey. 😛  And because I know I’ll get asked about the chicken finger recipe and also because it’s too good not to share and Momma Coale said I could, here ya go:  Cut chicken breast into thin strips or small pieces (I prefer nug size bc the breading to chicken ratio is perfection). Salt and pepper those babies really well. Then dredge them in all purpose flour, then egg, then panko - just like you would bread anything else. Then fry them up in a light oil - I use avocado oil because that’s our everyday oil. You could also use canola or peanut oil. Just fill a pan with an inch or so of oil on medium high heat. They only take 2-3 minutes per side. You can always temp them to make sure they are at least 165 degrees F to really make sure they are done. Dunk in all the sauces and enjoy!  Happy weekend!
I am not a craft mom. My version of crafts is baki I am not a craft mom. My version of crafts is baking because 1) my toddler actually engages with it and 2) we have tasty things to eat in the end.  Wanna know how long crafts last in our house? Approximately 23 seconds. Maybe 51 on a good day. So we just stopped crafting a long time ago and instead started baking.  And when I need my toddler to stay in one place, I turn on the faucet. I am still utterly amazed at how long water can entertain a small human. And it’s FREE. 🙌🏻 well, mostly..  Send me all your favorite baking recipes because we are on a roll over here 👩🏻‍🍳
Just left my mom vacation. 💆🏻‍♀️ I do Just left my mom vacation. 💆🏻‍♀️  I don’t know what this says about me. Anybody else find the dentist weirdly relaxing? For the most part, I love being with my two tiny humans all day, but BLESS does it feel good to lay in a chair for 60 minutes with my eyes closed and do nothing except hold my mouth open.
🙌🏻🙌🏻🙌🏻🙌🏻💃🏻💃🏻💃🏻 two babies are asleep at the same time in their beds (and not on me) for the FIRST TIME IN 7657 DAYS and dear lord I could cry tears of relief straight into this latte and bowl of chocolate chips bc I woke up this morning exhausted and weary and told Nick I didn’t want to parent today 🤣 Not even calling this self care. It’s sanity right now. And even if it lasts 5 minutes it will be 5 minutes of freaking glory. p.s. yes that brick is crooked bc v uneven floors are part of the charmed package of this old house
Learning over and over again in this season that f Learning over and over again in this season that feels unsettled and chaotic and longgggggg that sometimes, you just need the viewpoint of a toddler to remind you that the seemingly insignificant things & moments really are....straight up magical. And that yes, these mundane days are packed full of goodness & beauty if I keep my eyes fixed on what actually matters.
Spent two hours at Lowe’s this morning and wow, Spent two hours at Lowe’s this morning and wow, wowww 🤯 Asked at least six people where to find something and their opinion on all the options bc holy decision fatigue. Nursed my newborn on the floor of the paint aisle. And BLESS my new contractor friend Matt I found in the lumber section that pushed my cart around and helped me avoid the mistake of buying exterior wood for some DIY bathroom shelves.
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I’m giving all our bathrooms a DIY makeover and I couldn’t be more of a rookie. So shoutout to all my Lowe’s buddies and YouTube 😜 You’re making this happen.
We are now officially homeowners. WUT? We didn’t We are now officially homeowners. WUT? We didn’t plan to close on a house 10 weeks after having a baby, but here we are. And we are so, so grateful.  And I’m also terrified. We’ve moved three times and lived in three different states since we got married three years ago. After six years spent living in New York City and Boston, moving back to Charlottesville was really, really hard for me. I cried a lot those first six months because my heart ached for the northeast and for city life. I wanted to pack up and go back to Boston ASAP. It felt so different and so quiet here and at times, very lonely. Even though it felt like the next right step, I second guessed our decision A LOT.
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But here we are 10 months later ready to continue investing in this neighborhood we’ve come to love. And this community of people that have become so dear. Ten months later and it feels so, so right. And although committing to settling down here for a good bit feels really scary to me, it also brings so much peace to know we aren’t moving again anytime soon. We are here to plant and grow. And raise our babies in this house as we make it a home. It’s also really fun to have one of your best friends be your realtor. We love you @kelli.teter.nesting 🤗
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Now, to see if we make it out of this kitchen renovation all in one piece 🤪
my go-to breakfast these days is two fried eggs in my go-to breakfast these days is two fried eggs in ghee with sautéed spinach (also in ghee) and an english muffin with more ghee + some sort of jam on half for that sweet & savory combo. we discovered these local english muffins (from The Bread Basket) and they are doughy and delicious and we are obsessed.
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I’ve found that I need a solid source of protein and lots of fat for breakfast to keep me full while breastfeeding this time around vs with Cal, I was so into big bowls of pb & chocolate chip banana oatmeal. just goes to show our bodies know what they need and change cravings accordingly. also, just a psa: go pick up the maple butter from @traderjoes bc it is bonkers 🤤 and lastly, shout out to my husband bc a lot of mornings he is making this bfast for me while I nurse & try to pull myself out of bed - don’t for a moment think I’ve got it together 🤪
I’ve had many thoughts rolling around in my brai I’ve had many thoughts rolling around in my brain of if/how to use this platform in a way that aligns with how I want to live my life. I’m finding it tricky to discern that when 90% of my use on this app is for professional purposes. But I’m not sure if even professionally, it makes sense for me. Because I feel more aligned with what matters to me when I’m not regularly present here.  I’m not really sure what things will look like moving forward, but for right now I’m here to share with you that I somehow found some spare minutes between newborn & toddler life to write a post with some semi-coherent thoughts on life lately. 🤪 You can head there by clicking the link in my profile.
I’ve been completely disconnected from social me I’ve been completely disconnected from social media and that’s been vital for me during this tender postpartum period of transitioning from a mama of 1 to 2. But today, I’m bopping on briefly to share how Teddy entered this wild world with you - if you’re into a lengthy, detailed birth story, the link in my profile will lead you to the blog post 💙
Theodore “Teddy” Lars Nohling joined our famil Theodore “Teddy” Lars Nohling joined our family at 12:48am on Wednesday after a quick and swift labor & birth at home 💙 Thank you Father for another healthy baby boy & your abundant, tender love for us. What an undeserved gift.
Very grateful to be carrying another baby past his Very grateful to be carrying another baby past his due date, but also....LET’S GO DUDE. Still over here eating dates (check out the @ebbirth article on the research showing dates can help ripen (aka soften) your cervix, reduce the need for medical intervention in labor and can overall, improve birth outcomes) drinking red raspberry leaf tea and sleeping as much as possible with a 19 month old running around. And also trying to survive July in VA without public pools or splash pads bc it is BLAZIN HERE (and I’m a wuss with the heat 🤪)

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