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Food Freedom, Intuitive Eating, Self Care, Stress

Intuitive Eating & Alcohol Consumption

November 29, 2017 By Robyn 68 Comments

How does alcohol consumption relate to intuitive eating? Is there such thing as intuitive drinking?

This is a topic I’ve gotten a few reader requests on and one that I can certainly relate to. I’m not quite sure I have all the answers, but my relationship with alcohol and my journey with intuitive eating has changed significantly over the past five years and I’ve learned a lot. My hope in this post is to combine my personal experience with my clinical experience to shed some light on this touchy topic.

INTUITIVE DRINKING

First I think it’s important to recognize that everyone’s relationship with alcohol is different. It’s a sensitive topic. Alcoholism runs in my family. I also have family members who barely drink at all. I’ve personally seen the devastating affects of alcohol and I know this is not a topic to be taken lightly and want to be very sensitive. If you think you might have a problem with alcohol, first know you’re not alone. And second, please know there are many resources available to you.

While I’ve lived around unhealthy and dangerous drinking habits, that didn’t stop me from going through seasons of unhealthy and excessive drinking. I was your typical sorority girl at Indiana University where I spent a lot of my weekends at the frat house taking shots or at the bar until 2am, followed up by late night pizza and a nasty hangover the next day. Only to do it all over again the next weekend. In college I would restrict my calories on days I planned on drinking. If I didn’t plan on drinking and a spontaneous event came up where there would be alcohol, I wouldn’t go. I had to plan ahead of time if I was drinking so I could compensate for the alcohol calories consumed by not eating as much during the day. And then because I hadn’t eaten that much, alcohol hit me a lot faster and I almost always ended up feeling way looser than I intended. Looking back, it was as stressful as it sounds. And now my 28 year old brain is like, yes DUH ROBYN. If you don’t eat and then take shots you won’t feel good.

Throughout my early twenties when I moved to Charlottesville, I continued to drink in social settings. I would drink with the intention of getting at least tipsy, if not drunk. My drinking was less frequent, but the when I did drink…I drank in excess.

INTUITIVE DRINKING

Throughout my years in Charlottesville over time I began drinking less (since shots at the bar or frat were replaced with glasses or wine or a cocktail..I couldn’t fathom the idea or the purpose of a shot) and had given up on restricting calories during the day because the stress was no longer worth it. Because of those two things, I didn’t find myself face deep into a large pizza at midnight and I was better able to gauge how much alcohol I could drink and still feel okay the next day. But I still struggled with a healthy and peaceful relationship with alcohol and with food when alcohol was around. I was still mentally restricting foods, telling myself for example, “cupcakes are bad, you shouldn’t eat them.” So when I was at a party drinking alcohol and cupcakes were around…I felt out of control and would eat past fullness.

I share all that to say, I can certainly relate to binge drinking, restricting my food intake to compensate for alcohol calories and “drunk eating” at night. Some of you might have no idea what I’m talking about, and I’m so thankful for that. Some of you might know exactly what I’m talking about, and I want you to know that you’re not alone. I get it.

I’m now at a much healthier place with alcohol. Rarely, rarely rarely do I end up drunk. Thankfully. Sometimes at an occasional wedding where I get swept up in the occassion and end up having my glass of wine refilled too many times. Then I realize I need to start chugging water because I’m feeling the alcohol way too much. And I don’t worry about alcohol calories at all now, what I eat on days I drink alcohol is the same as on days I don’t. And I’m thankful for that too.

For the purpose of this post and this space, I want to focus the conversation on alcohol and how that integrates with intuitive eating. The rest of this post if for those who don’t struggle with addiction or an unhealthy relationship with alcohol. If you do, I’d encourage you to seek out help from someone you trust or the resources linked above. If you don’t care for the taste of alcohol or abstain from it for many other very valid reasons, that is 100% OKAY. I would never want this post to make anyone feel like they should be drinking alcohol. Rather, I hope it sheds some light on how to bridge alcohol consumption with intuitive eating.

INTUITIVE DRINKING

It’s the holiday season. So now more than ever you will hear about the calories in such and such food just as much as you hear about the calories in spiked egg nog or mulled wine. “A glass of egg nog has just as many calories as three slices of pizza!” Ugh. Way to totally kill the holiday mood and experience. Every holiday party or social gathering somehow becomes a cocktail shaker filled with our calorie fears, social nerves and the pressure to be merry as ever. It’s a lot. And I think our experiences can most often go one of two ways.

  1. We feel distracted from the social experience because we’re riddled with fear, avoiding the food and drinks and thinking about calories the entire time.
  2. We grab another drink, then another cookie, then we freak out and think, “well screw it” and then grab another drink and cookie. Perhaps this cycle happens a few more times.

Which makes me think, perhaps it’s not the social event or festivities itself, but the fear, morality and mental/emotional restriction that leads to us to over doing it?

IS INTUITIVE DRINKING POSSIBLE?

Whether that’s with drinking one too many drinks, eating one too many cookies or slices of pizza, or restricting calories during the day to compensate for the alcohol we plan on drinking tonight or the alcohol we drank the night before. It all circles back to rules and regulations and disconnecting from how we feel in the moment and how we want to feel the next day.

Food and alcohol are not the same thing at all. Equating a drinking problem with disordered eating is a false and harmful misunderstanding. But, I do think there are some similarities between the two. If we think about it, both food and alcohol are coping mechanisms used for emotional soothing/numbing and also self-harm. Both can have the potential to negatively impact your mental and physical health. And both food and alcohol are treated as something to avoid and control rather than enjoy and appreciate.

INTUITIVE DRINKING

Intuitive eating allows us to come to peace with food. It allows us to dismantle morality from food and see food in a neutral way –  where we can eat out of self care and desire rather than self harm and distress. It allows us the freedom to stop fearing food and instead appreciate, respect and enjoy food. And then move on and fill our days with other more meaningful things. Through intuitive eating we learn to cue into our body’s internal wisdom vs external rules.

So although alcohol is different than food, what if we approached booze with the same intuitive mindset? In the same way that intuitive allows us to eat pizza for dinner and not compensate by eating a salad for lunch or a smoothie for breakfast the next day, what if we allowed ourselves the freedom to drink alcohol in a mindful way without judgment and without restricting calories before, during or after drinking?

Through my own personal experiences I’ve realized that when I took an intuitive approach to alcohol and placed it on neutral ground I began to enjoy it more, not drink more of it. For me, feeling stressed around food and using food as my default to emotionally cope (which can be one tool to self soothe, but we need other tools) was never helpful. In the same way, telling myself I shouldn’t drink because of the calories or using alcohol to self soothe and cope was always stressful and never helpful. When I began to release the stress and fear around calories, and instead be more mindful around alcohol I was better able to make conscious and intentional decisions about how much and when to drink. And that allowed me to better care for my body and my mind.

INTUITIVE DRINKING

While I’m never going to tell you how much or when to drink, I hope these tips and tools help you decide what is best for your body and for your mind when it come to drinking alcohol.

ASK YOURSELF WHY YOU’RE DRINKING BEFORE YOU TAKE YOUR FIRST SIP

This is the first thing. Why are you craving alcohol or choosing to drink? Is it to numb out, relieve stress, cope, fit in..? If the answer is yes, ask yourself if this is how you want to deal with how you’re feeling. Are there other healthier and more fitting ways you can deal with your feelings? If you’re drinking for the taste or experience I think those could be healthy reasons to consume alcohol.

LET GO OF THE RULES AROUND ALCOHOL 

Just like intuitive eating teaches us to let go of the morality, restriction and compensatory mechanisms around food, do the same with alcohol. If you want a glass of wine on a Tuesday and it feels mindful, drink it. Think about how you feel during and after. Is that how you want to feel? Does that help you be your best version of yourself? When I started drinking a small glass of wine during the week at home with dinner, I felt way less vulnerable to drinking 3 or 4 on a Friday night as I collapsed into the weekend. Just like pleasurable and less nutrient dense foods such as a cookie or cupcake are part of healthy eating, alcohol can be too. Remember that intuitive eating means listening to your hunger and cravings vs outside food rules… and that applies on days you do and don’t drink alcohol. Compensating for calories is dieting, not intuitive eating.

CHECK IN WITH YOUR APPETITE BEFORE YOU DRINK

Alcohol inhibits ghrelin – your hunger hormone – which makes food sound less appetizing and your hunger cues less reliable. And what we know is that alcohol is absorbed more quickly on an empty stomach. Say hello to feeling more buzzed than you intended and maybe even hungover. Blah. So be mindful about having a drink before you eat knowing it might affect your appetite. And if that happy hour drink does kill you dinner appetite, part of intuitive eating is eating out of self care. This would be a time where you eat out of self care and eat something anyway to make sure your stomach isn’t empty. You’ll avoid a hangover and the intense hunger that comes with it. Too much alcohol and not enough food causes you blood sugar to be all over the place. Couple that with the dehydrating affect of alcohol and your body is programmed to wake up in survival mode. Which means you’ll be craving starchy comfort foods in the morning. This isn’t necessarily a “bad” thing, but pair it with a hangover and it doesn’t lead to the most intuitive and stress free eating experience.

RECOGNIZE THE TRUTH BEHIND THE DRUNK EATING 

The same blood sugar drop that causes a hangover can also lead to you feeling “munchy” the night before – hence the stereotype of late night pizza after a night of drinking. (I’m raising my hand here..) Since we’re talking about intuitive eating, more importantly is to recognize alcohol lowers your inhibitions, therefore you’re more likely to eat foods that you have restricted in your every day life. Then you wake up the next morning in a tornado of self shaming and guilt for eating those foods. If you allow yourself to eat foods sober, you won’t feel the urge to eat certain foods only when tipsy. When I stopped restricting certain foods from my life, I found the late night eating stopped too. Would I eat something if I was hungry after being out with friends and having some drinks? Sure. But it felt calm and intentional, not chaotic and cloaked in judgment.

TAKE A DEEP BREATH AND WITHHOLD JUDGEMENT

As with any habit or behavior, can you without judgment and instead get curious? There’s nothing wrong with enjoying alcohol in a healthy way. But do a periodic self check to ensure it stays healthy. Is it becoming habit forming or addictive? Is it becoming an unhealthy coping mechanism? Is it adding to or taking away from you living your best life? If you feel your alcohol consumption might be negatively impacting your life take a break and see how you feel – physically and mentally. Go to a social event and drink soda + lime vs alcohol and check in with how you socialize. But remember, abstaining from alcohol can be another form of a diet and any form of restriction never ends in a healthy place. Have an open, curious mind as you learn what amount and frequency of alcohol feels best in your body and mind.

Taking a break from alcohol doesn’t mean you’re an alcoholic. (If you feel your alcohol consumption could be problematic, remember, there are lots of resources available.) But a break can help you see more clearly the motivation behind your behaviors become more self aware, decide if those behaviors are serving you, and grow more confident in how you care for yourself.
I’d love to hear your thoughts in the comments section!


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Filed Under: Food Freedom, Intuitive Eating, Self Care, Stress

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Comments

  1. Ashley says

    November 29, 2017 at 9:22 am

    I really enjoyed this post! Back in college, I also did a lot of irresponsible binge drinking, and a few years later, I’ve now realized I feel like crap when I do that. I always felt depressed the next day and I never felt physically good from all that alcohol. Not only that, but I realized I was using alcohol to deal with feeling insecure about myself – I would use it to help me socialize “better” and make people like me more. I sometimes drink now, but I stay tuned in with how I’m feeling and I don’t pressure myself to drink more if I don’t truly want to. I still struggle with a lot of aspects of my practice in intuitive eating, but this is one thing I’ve been able to get a good handle on. Really love your rawness and honesty, thanks Robyn. 🙂

    Reply
    • Robyn says

      December 1, 2017 at 5:39 pm

      I can 100% relate to using alcohol to feel more comfortable in unknown social situations. Thanks for sharing and being honest Ashley 🙂

      Reply
  2. Bridget says

    November 29, 2017 at 9:29 am

    This is the first intuitive drinking post that I’ve seen that is SO accurate! You made it so easy for individuals to understand. Thank you for writing this! I too used to restrict calories to compensate for drinking and I never understood why I would get drunker than my friends. Now it seems so obvious, but there is such little information out there that talks about dieting & drinking. Thankful you are spreading this message!

    Reply
    • Robyn says

      December 1, 2017 at 5:40 pm

      I’m glad you enjoyed Bridget! I can soooo relate to being the friend that was a “light weight” when really it was because I wasn’t eating….duh Robyn.

      Reply
  3. Kelly says

    November 29, 2017 at 9:33 am

    Robin, thank you so much for this thoughtful post. As someone who has also seen the devastating effects of alcohol in my family, I love the way you approached this topic and am grateful for your non-judgmental tone and wisdom.

    Reply
    • Robyn says

      December 1, 2017 at 6:12 pm

      Thank you for your encouraging feedback Kelly!

      Reply
  4. Amber @ Bloom Nutrition Therapy says

    November 29, 2017 at 9:59 am

    I absolutely LOVE THIS!! And this provides a lot of clarity for questions I’ve had, but I just really didn’t know how to ask. I grew up in the “bible belt” of Kentucky, where drinking in any form is very taboo. No one in my family drinks alcohol and until just last year, I still lived in a dry county. In fact, my hometown is still a dry county. However, I didn’t want that to take away from the life I wanted to live. I have never felt confined to these traditional values and enjoy a glass of wine here and there. It was once I began intuitive eating, that I actually also saw my alcohol consumption increase. Not to the point that I was EVER getting drunk, but just to say it increased because before I was restricting it, much the same as you discussed here. However, now that I have adapted an intuitive eating approach, I have struggled with ‘how much is too much’ alcohol. And now more than ever I seem to feel a sense of morality with whether or not my drinking a glass of wine on a week night is a “bad” thing because others in my family or in this area would think that it is bad. BUT, I love how you have clarified here. I feel now that my increase in consumption is ONLY because I no longer restrict myself. I genuinely see nothing wrong with enjoying a glass of wine on a weeknight, especially when I know in other parts of the country it is totally normal to have a glass of wine with dinner nearly EVERY night. Thanks so much for this!

    Reply
    • Robyn says

      December 1, 2017 at 6:13 pm

      I can totally see how growing up in a more conservative Christian environment could foster a legalistic view on alcohol. Thanks for sharing your journey and how your environment shaped your views. I know others can relate!

      Reply
  5. Aoife says

    November 29, 2017 at 10:03 am

    Thank you for this wonderful post! I found at the height of my disordered eating problems I would also turn to alcohol to compensate for my anxiety and unhappiness. Like you described, I’d restrict calories during the day, get drunk and then secretly and ashamedly binge when I got home. Thankfully that’s all behind me now. You also make a great point that restricting alcohol is still restriction that will lead to bingeing. Everytime I’d try to stop drinking completely I’d end up binge drinking and regretting it. Mindfulness is key! Wonderful post, thank you!

    Reply
    • Robyn says

      December 1, 2017 at 6:14 pm

      I had the same experience with going “sober” and then finding myself a bottle deep on a Friday night with girlfriends…not good!

      Reply
  6. Molly says

    November 29, 2017 at 10:35 am

    Thanks for the great post Robyn! My past drinking sounds exactly like your college experience. I still feel that I struggle with balancing restricting calories before drinking which I know just makes the effects of alcohol worse. I hope one day I can get to a place where I eat normally throughout the day even if I am drinking later on. I want to stop feeling bad about the calories in alcohol. I find it to be a “diet-y” mentality of mine to feel bad about drinking calories– whether in alcohol, a smoothie, coffee drinks, etc.

    Reply
    • Robyn says

      December 1, 2017 at 6:15 pm

      You will get there Molly! There is space for you there, I see it 🙂

      Reply
  7. Amanda L. says

    November 29, 2017 at 10:56 am

    Awesome post, Robyn! I started using Intuitive Eating in my practice earlier this year, but I’ve always wondered the best approach when it comes to alcohol. This is the first article I have come across that discusses the two. Thanks for taking on the challenge of writing this. Very helpful! 🙂

    Reply
    • Robyn says

      December 2, 2017 at 3:02 pm

      I’m so glad you found it helpful Amanda – I too haven’t found much written on it either so thought I might as well take a stab at it 🙂

      Reply
  8. Liz says

    November 29, 2017 at 10:57 am

    This is a thoughtful post, but I think people also need to consider where their “intuitive” drinking consumption lands them on the scale of light, moderate, and heavy drinking. More than two drinks in a day is considered binge drinking by the CDC, and whether or not you want to agree with that definition, there is no doubt that it’s easy to have 3-4 drinks and still “feel good” at a holiday party (we’ve all been there – two overly large pours of Chardonnay over two hours and you’re already set, although you’re probably just tipsy and not falling down drunk). There are far more reasons to restrict alcohol consumption than to restrict calories and those are still worth having a conversation about – reducing your cancer risk, reducing damage to your liver, protecting the quality of your sleep, keeping your wits about you to be responsive to your family and friends, etc. Perhaps it would be better to ask yourself not only “does this taste good/will this make me feel good,” but “would any more pose additional risks to my health?” Health is not just body size!

    Reply
    • Liz says

      November 29, 2017 at 11:09 am

      ETA: Sorry, I had a typo – it’s actually 4 drinks on one occasion for women, not 2! That gives a little more room, but it’s still very easy to hit that target early on. Do that twice in a weekend and you’re at the limit for “heavy drinking” – 8 drinks in a week for women.

      Reply
    • A says

      November 29, 2017 at 1:09 pm

      I agree. I have mixed feelings on this post given the data that shows how binge drinking is so much more common than people know or realize. I don’t think there’s anything wrong with drinking but I feel like perhaps this topic is incomplete in the way it’s brought up if that makes sense.

      Reply
      • Robyn says

        December 2, 2017 at 3:12 pm

        I agree that binge drinking is a problem. I think if we are being intuitive and assessing how alcohol makes us feel physically, emotionally, mentally, relationally, etc ..I’m pretty confident that people would not find themselves binge drinking…ever. It’s because we DISCONNECT from ourselves (body and mind and therefore intuitively) that both myself and others find themselves binge drinking.

        Thanks for sharing your thoughts and concerns and starting a conversation around this!

        Reply
    • Robyn says

      December 2, 2017 at 3:09 pm

      Hi Liz — I completely agree with you, healthy is not just body size and I think that is the reigning theme of this space, that health is NOT simply what you eat and how you exercise and how that affects your body size.

      And I hear you when you say everyone needs to consider their habits around alcohol. Unless I made the post 5000 + words, there’s no way to cover it all. I started the bulk of this post with these sentences…

      “The rest of this post if for those who don’t struggle with addiction or an unhealthy relationship with alcohol. If you do, I’d encourage you to seek out help from someone you trust or the resources linked above.”

      I think we have to realize there are tons of things that increase our “cancer risk” and cause liver damage, mess with the quality of our sleep and pose risks to our health. I’m in no way making alcohol into fruit juice, but I think if we are asking those questions I’ve posed in the article about how does it make you feel (which goes beyond physical and includes mental/emotional/relational/spiritual health etc then answering those questions is going to allow us to drink alcohol in a healthy way. The key is to really get honest with yourself.

      Thanks for your comment and thoughts Liz!

      Reply
  9. Delaney Coman says

    November 29, 2017 at 11:58 am

    First post I have read about this topic that was so refreshing and brought so much clarity! Amen to all of this, you are the bomb.

    Reply
    • Robyn says

      December 2, 2017 at 3:15 pm

      Glad you enjoyed Delaney!

      Reply
  10. Devon says

    November 29, 2017 at 1:25 pm

    Thank you SO much for sharing this post. As I’m learning to have a more intuitive, balanced mindset around food, I continue to struggle with where social gatherings and alcohol fit into a more flexible lifestyle. I too find myself making efforts to compensate throughout the day if I have plans to meet up with others for drinks. It makes the whole experience much less pleasurable, and I am so thankful you were able to capture this feeling into words. It is so encouraging to relate to others through this topic. Thank you again, as always, for such a wonderful post!

    Reply
    • Robyn says

      December 2, 2017 at 3:16 pm

      I can certainly relate to your feeling Devon. I am thinking of you and encouraging you on in this journey <3

      Reply
  11. Fiona says

    November 29, 2017 at 2:21 pm

    Thank You so much for this post Robin! Your gentleness and honesty with this topic is so helpful and considerate. I used to go through exactly the same cycle. Thank you for your valuable words and inspiration 🙂

    Reply
    • Robyn says

      December 2, 2017 at 3:16 pm

      <3 <3 Fiona

      Reply
  12. Julianne says

    November 29, 2017 at 2:21 pm

    Thanks for explaining this difficult topic 🙂 I am so glad I have found a healthy relationship with alcohol. Being able to enjoy a fancy cocktail when I’m out at dinner is so nice. I love that alcohol can just be something pleasurable like a cookie or a bubble bath…not stressful. There are enough stressors in life! The most important piece for me was understanding I can say no/approach alcohol the way I want to, not the way social norms may sometimes dictate how we approach alcohol.

    Reply
    • Robyn says

      December 2, 2017 at 3:18 pm

      Yes I love how you refer to alcohol as something that can be pleasurable…it’s there for us if it adds to our life but we have the control to say no if that’s what adds to our lives.

      Reply
  13. Lindsey says

    November 29, 2017 at 2:21 pm

    Thank you for this! I can 100 percent relate. I don’t drink very often but when I do I know I will binge eat! Happened this past weekend. I am not in a place of intuitive eating (yet) and so when that first drink is gone I bing eat because my inhibitions are gone and I feel shame and guilt the next day for what I ate. So I will intentionally NOT drink for a while because i don’t want to binge eat. I don’t know how to have a glass of alcohol with my husband and enjoy the evening because food consumes me after I par take in a drink. I would love to get to a place of intuitive eating and then this will hopefully not be a issue…. not there yet and not sure when i will be. Thank you again for your openness.

    Reply
    • Robyn says

      December 2, 2017 at 3:19 pm

      Thank you for vulnerably sharing Lindsey! Know that you are NOT alone and that many women (including myself) can relate to your feelings at one point or another

      xx

      Reply
  14. McKenzie Caldwell says

    November 29, 2017 at 2:51 pm

    This topic is so important! I love how you stressed that alcohol is not the same as food, and can be legitimately dangerous, but that approaching drinking with the same intuition as you would food can help you safely enjoy alcohol in a balanced way.
    After leaving college, I find that I’m much more willing to spend a little bit more on a drink that is interesting or tastes good, and enjoy that moment instead of spending less so I can drink more. This quality over quantity mentality has helped me drink intuitively.

    Reply
    • Robyn says

      December 2, 2017 at 3:20 pm

      Quality over quantity – love that point you shared McKenzie!

      Reply
  15. Sydney says

    November 29, 2017 at 3:17 pm

    Thank you so much for this post Robyn. Alcoholism also runs in my family and I too have experienced the devastating effects alcoholism can have on a family. I have gone back and forth a lot with this topic in the past, especially that now my younger brother has decided not to drink at all and I wondered if I should do the same. I will often do a similar “check-in” with myself to find out really why I am drinking and I try to keep the drinking only to times of fun or celebration and not drink when I’m feeling sad or down. I will admit to having a couple of glasses of wine on a Friday night after a stressful week but I don’t feel that I need to have it or can’t live without it. I hope to continue to include alcohol in a healthy way in my diet but I also hope that I would have the ability to recognize if it ever became more than that. I think that this topic needs to be brought up more with our age group so I think it’s great you’re starting this conversation even if it might be a bit controversial.

    Reply
    • Robyn says

      December 2, 2017 at 3:20 pm

      I totally agree that this is a conversation that we are not having that often. Thank you for sharing so bravely Sydney!

      Reply
  16. Bee says

    November 29, 2017 at 5:30 pm

    Thanks for this!
    I binged for the first time in nearly 80 days last weekend after having one too many drinks! Thankfully i’m at a place where this doesn’t devastate me anymore and i can use it as an opportunity to get super curious (e.g. am i still subconsciously restricting? was this a backlash from food guilt or body shaming?) .

    I’ve also realised i should probably stop counting my ‘binge free days’ as it can make me feel like ive gone back to square one, when in reality i should be really proud of my self.

    In other news i tried egg nog the other day! we’re seriously missing out on that drink in the UK! This time last year i would not have even tried it because i would have been worried about the calories/ messing up my diet. Recovery is worth it xxxxxx

    Reply
    • Robyn says

      December 2, 2017 at 3:21 pm

      YES
      curiosity >> judgement always. everything is a learning opportunity

      Recovery IS worth it! Rooting for you <3

      Reply
  17. Victoria Yates says

    November 29, 2017 at 7:26 pm

    Thank you for writing this Robyn! So well put. I have had a similar experience since being more intuitive with eating and having that correlate with how I drink alcohol. Love that you touched on a not as talked about subject and totally nailed it!

    Reply
    • Robyn says

      December 2, 2017 at 3:21 pm

      <3 <3

      Reply
  18. randee Schwartz says

    November 29, 2017 at 8:37 pm

    Thank you Robin! I always appreciate how you discuss hormones in an “easy to digest manner.” Finally, thank you for your open-mindedness concerning a sensitive issue that affects a lot of us! I love the taste wine and enjoy it on the weekends. However, there were definitely times in the past that I drank for reasons outside of taste. Learning to sit with emotions rather than hide from them…that is a life’s journey!

    Reply
    • Robyn says

      December 2, 2017 at 3:22 pm

      Thank you Randee for your encouragement – its’ a sensitive subject for sure but one I think is important to have. Thanks for sharing!

      Reply
  19. Kaitlyn @ Powered by Sass says

    November 29, 2017 at 9:49 pm

    Awesome post and totally put into words how I feel about drinking! Happy to have found your blog. 🙂

    Reply
    • Robyn says

      December 2, 2017 at 3:23 pm

      Welcome Kaitlyn!!

      Reply
  20. Anna says

    November 29, 2017 at 9:56 pm

    Thanks so much for this post! I feel like your journey with alcohol has been very similar to mine (and no doubt countless others) I always appreciate your perspective, grace, and openness when discussing these topics. Great work, as always!

    Reply
    • Robyn says

      December 2, 2017 at 3:23 pm

      We are so not alone and I think that’s comforting and give shame less room to get in. Thanks for reading Anna!

      Reply
  21. Tory says

    November 29, 2017 at 10:06 pm

    This is great! I have noticed since starting my intuitive eating journey that I crave alcohol much less often. I think it is because I used alcohol frequently to allow myself to “let loose” and that is when I would eat all my forbidden foods and majorly binge. Now that I’m not restricting foods, I don’t think I need that as often.

    Reply
    • Robyn says

      December 2, 2017 at 3:30 pm

      That’s makes a lot of sense Tory – what’ great insight! I’m sure others can relate perhaps. Thanks for sharing 🙂

      Reply
  22. Caroline says

    November 29, 2017 at 11:40 pm

    Thank you!! I can 100% relate to your behaviors – I have acted and thought the same ways. 2 years into my intuitive eating journey, I have finally begun to mindfully enjoy alcohol. Thanks for the insight; it will certainly keep me moving forward in my journey. I hope that you do the same!

    Reply
    • Robyn says

      December 2, 2017 at 3:30 pm

      Cheering you on in your journey Caroline!

      Reply
  23. Savannah says

    November 30, 2017 at 3:36 am

    Love your post- I’m in college now and I feel like it’s becoming cool to brag about how little you had to eat that day or how much of a lightweight you are so that way guys will say “no duh you’re a lightweight it’s because you’re so skinny”. It makes me really sad. I hate how college binge drinking is so normalized and almost respected in college. I’m really looking forward to graduating so my friends drink like reasonable adults rather than college kids. For myself, I never really find myself craving alcohol and only drink it socially but maybe that will change when i’m around good alcohols.

    Reply
    • Robyn says

      December 2, 2017 at 3:31 pm

      It felt very similar to your experience when I was in college Savannah. Looking back I’m horrified. I was itching to get out of college by the end of my senior year where I felt like I could breathe from the binge drinking culture. So know your’e not alone 🙂

      Reply
  24. C. says

    November 30, 2017 at 7:11 am

    Love the blog. So much wonderful information here. A question I have is regarding intuitive eating. How does this work for the “ post Menapause woman”? I am 62 -avid workout enthusiast…. fond of plant based diet for my body. I have to say that I have a good relationship with food and have been on the small size ( 102-106#) all my life. (Exception… 3 babes 29-33 years ago). However this size post Menapause is tough staying at. Believe me when I say, it is hard. One cannot stay same shape/size/ weight without daily workouts/ walks with our 3 dogs…. and eat like one used to eat. For me it is “planned eating and meals “ that make this work for me. Any ideas or suggestions ? My Menapause GYN is not too helpfl with regards to diet. Good luck on the Boston move…. our daughter did her college/ grad school in Boston and we loved visiting her while there.

    Reply
    • Robyn says

      December 2, 2017 at 3:33 pm

      Hi C! Thanks for your comment. While I don’t know much of your story so can’t speak much to it…it sounds like the weight you are at isn’t sustainable for your body size since it takes daily workouts and eating a regimented way to do that. I would encourage you to perhaps talk with a non diet dietitian you trust or perhaps pick up the book Health At Every Size…our bodies change and that’s okay!

      Thanks for sharing!

      Reply
  25. Valerie says

    November 30, 2017 at 9:50 am

    Such an important topic! I’ve been working on a project around this issue. This is so taboo because binge drinking is normalized among young adults (especially women in their 20’s). As I am currently coming out of an eating disorder and I’ve noticed my motives around alcohol are the same as food. I’ve been exploring ways to put my sober self in settings where I would typically drink and dissect my emotions. Taking a break from alcohol can truly help reevaluate your relationship and strengthen it altogether. While working towards balance with drinking, I recommend starting out in places you’re familiar with and with people you trust. I believe we should be treating alcohol the same way as dessert, it’s nice to have but in excess isn’t going to make you feel great.

    Reply
    • Robyn says

      December 2, 2017 at 3:34 pm

      Love that dessert analogy and everything you said here Valerie. So true, inspiring and helpful for others!

      Reply
  26. Katherine says

    December 1, 2017 at 9:03 am

    Robyn, thank you for being bold and posting about this sensitive topic! This post is really getting me thinking. In college (not that long ago) I was very concerned about drinking calories, whether that was alcohol, juice, etc. Now I am not as concerned about that, especially as I have started practicing intuitive eating. I do feel like I still drink to cope with stress or social anxiety (not to excess at all, but a glass of wine after a stressful day is always so nice). Because of this post, I am going to try to practicing intuitive drinking. It’s all about being mindful!

    Reply
    • Robyn says

      December 2, 2017 at 3:35 pm

      Glad it was helpful Katherine! And thank you for sharing your story and where you’re at!

      Reply
  27. Carey Aiken says

    December 1, 2017 at 5:14 pm

    Love this post! I’ve always enjoyed a drink, previously mainly for social, “let’s get drunk” reasons but more now to enjoy alcohol I like such as red wine, craft beers and gin. I very rarely get drunk now (well I’m pregnant so never but before that!) If I do let go of my inhibitions and drink a little more than I would like and feel slightly worse for wear the next day I struggle a little with feelings of guilt but I have been working on that!! I’m very much looking forward to the first red wine or stout after my child is born!!

    Reply
    • Robyn says

      December 2, 2017 at 3:35 pm

      Thanks for sharing Carey and congrats on your baby!!!

      Reply
  28. Rosamund says

    December 2, 2017 at 5:25 pm

    Great post. I appreciate you writing about such a tricky topic. Remind me of when I was at University and people would purposely not eat all day so they could get drunk faster, it was ‘eating is cheating’ which is such a sad reflection of New Zealand’s drinking culture.
    I really relate to the this and had an a-ha moment when you mentioned no longer drunk eating foods like pizza because you weren’t restricting them. I can remember eating a certain way in the days leading up to a night out with the mentality that I would drink but also binge on food. So I would over-eat when drunk and feel awful the next day. I haven’t done that in so long and didn’t click my relationship with alcohol has changed along with my relationship towards food.

    Reply
  29. rachel nannola says

    December 21, 2017 at 5:53 pm

    LOVED this post. Thank you for writing it! I can totally relate to everything you talked about here and hoping one day I can be at the place you are with alcohol and food freedom.

    Reply
  30. Megan says

    July 2, 2018 at 2:44 pm

    I just reread this post because it was featured in your newsletter. And let me just say that it’s EXACTLY what I needed to hear. I’m on vacation where more drinking inevitably happens but I was feeling like I’ve just been coping with alcohol lately. Being a country girl in a city is a lonely place sometimes. I’m more inspired to look inward and ask myself these questions so I can move forward without judgement. Thank you for reminding me about this post.

    Reply
    • Robyn says

      September 28, 2018 at 6:59 pm

      I’m so glad this resonated with you Megan! Love to you!!

      Reply
  31. Holly says

    September 28, 2018 at 6:43 pm

    I just LOVE is! Thank you for taking the time and being open enough to explore this and share your own experiences expeirences. It’s the exact topic I’ve been pondering and what you have said resonates deeply with my relationship to alcohol. Well said, in so many ways!

    Reply
    • Robyn says

      September 28, 2018 at 6:59 pm

      I’m so so glad this resonated for you Holly <3

      Reply
  32. Anita says

    October 5, 2018 at 8:45 am

    Really useful. Thank you

    Reply
  33. Laurel says

    June 12, 2019 at 2:45 pm

    I read this post a year ago (or whenever it first came out) and I can distinctly remember being super triggered by it – it was too much for me to think about repairing my relationship with alcohol in that time. Happy to say re-reading it I feel a sense of peace and calm, and ready to start asking myself some questions about alcohol that I shied away from last year! Thanks Robyn, as always your compassionate and informed posts are healing!

    Reply

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A non-diet dietitian and nurse practitioner helping women find peace with food, accept their natural body size and heal from hormonal issues and period problems.

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I have yet to experience postpartum myself, but I've had many clients and readers that have been through that season of life. Or perhaps you are currently living through the postpartum period. Every woman's body is different, therefore every woman's experience after giving birth will be different. What works for one woman, might not work for the next. While one woman might go through postpartum and adjust to newborn life quiet seamlessly, another woman might find it much more difficult. She might need the support of medication, therapy, extra help and many other things. One way is not better than the other - they are simply two different ways of navigating the postpartum period. I hope this post helps you better care for yourself, whatever that means for you. There's no right or wrong way to care for yourself as a mom or your new baby.

Postpartum Hormones: what’s happening in your body and how to care for yourself

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A little way I’m learning to enjoy these years o A little way I’m learning to enjoy these years of getting to spend so much time with my kids: aka another way I’m discovering some pockets of peace so my heart & mind & soul don’t crumble under the reality of dependent & emotionally dysregulated tiny humans.  About once a week we go somewhere for baked goods. We drive or walk, buy something buttery & then find a beautiful, relatively quiet outdoor spot where the boys can romp and I can sit and think my thoughts while I watch them play. This past week we were found ourselves at the Wool Factory where the boys threw rocks & whatever else off the bridge while I ate 90% of this almond 🥐 from @coucourachou that will blow your mind. Boys ate the other 10% bc they were busy playing and didn’t ask for more quickly enough 😜  I’m finding *for me* playgrounds have a time & place but they aren’t where I enjoy motherhood & my two toddlers the most. Baked goods & a pretty outdoor spot without high drops my 15 month old could launch himself off of…I’m here for it.
I brought this bag of snacks along when I took the I brought this bag of snacks along when I took the boys to hike out at one of our favorite spots last week and when I ripped it open I was regretting my choice to share them with my kids. @baresnacks randomly sent me a box of snacks and I usually eat free food we receive or give it to a friend/neighbor and move on. But I felt it my duty to tell you about these bc they are THAT GOOD. I’m not getting paid and this isn’t sponsored - I was just shocked at how tasty these were and felt you needed to know. We ate them with some buttery roasted nuts and the combo was 👌🏻 but they are good just on their own.  The boys climbed rocks and swam in the reservoir - leave it to my almost 3 year old to want to strip down naked and fully submerge himself in chilly water on a sixty degree morning. “Mama can I get super nakey?” Sure baby. Sure. This is your childhood.
It’s a hard sell to get me to accept an offer of It’s a hard sell to get me to accept an offer of extended alone time away from the babies to just be. And that isn’t something that’s best for me, it’s an area I gotta grow in. So this afternoon when Nick pushed me out the door and was like - get out of here plzzzz - I walked to my favorite cafe and ordered a thick pastrami sandwich and sat there for a good LONG while before taking a long, peaceful walk in the rain to wrap up the afternoon. Note to self: stop being such a control freak and go be by yourself sometimes.
a girlfriend brought me a 🍪 the size of my face a girlfriend brought me a 🍪 the size of my face from @mariebettecafe this morning when she came to get her toddler who played with us all morning and it is v good. even better when paired with an iced latte 😍
#AlignPartner I left off a few weeks ago sharing a #AlignPartner I left off a few weeks ago sharing about how taking @alignprobiotic regularly has improved my digestive regularity.  And I’m still taking them! I’ve permanently added Align 24/7 Digestive Support* into the roundup of supplements I take before bed (prenatal, vitamin D, choline & DHA - all which help keep me healthy while breastfeeding) so I can keep seeing the benefits.  Just because you see benefits, doesn’t mean you should stop taking your probiotic. Keep taking Align daily (under the supervision and recommendation of your health care provider of course) to keep seeing the benefits!  I’ve said it before and I’ll say it again - one of my favorite parts of Align probiotics is that they don’t need refrigeration AND they come in a convenient little blister pack that has the days labeled. It’s the little things people! #MyAlignGuutJourney #guthealth  *These statements have not been evaluated by the Food and Drug Administration. This product is not intended to diagnose, treat, cure, or prevent any disease.
I realized it was going to be a long, hot afternoo I realized it was going to be a long, hot afternoon (91 and muggy in MAY 🤯) when a toddler nap was refused and a baby nap was cut wildly short ....so my tired mom brain pulled out two plastic storage bins, filled them up with soap & hose water and striped ‘em down naked in the yard. Two hours later, it was almost time for an early dinner and I had magically been able to sit for most of that time and we already had baths checked off the list. 👍🏻 I’m archiving this idea for my future self, hope it helps another tired mama out.
#AlignPartner I left off a month ago sharing about #AlignPartner I left off a month ago sharing about getting better at doing the basics to care for myself which included taking my supplements and @alignprobiotic regularly.  Probiotics take time to work so I wanted to give it a full month to see the full effects of @alignprobiotic. So here are my honest thoughts: it took a few weeks to notice any differences, but near the end of the month I did notice some changes in my digestive balance - even while traveling! I’m not someone who experiences occasional gas, bloating or abdominal discomfort frequently enough to notice a difference, so I don’t feel like I can comment on how well Align works for those benefits.  All in all though, taking @alignprobiotic was a positive experience and I really appreciated how the capsules don’t need to be stored in the fridge, making it convenient to take them with me anywhere #MyAlignGuutJourney #guthealth  *These statements have not been evaluated by the Food and Drug Administration. This product is not intended to diagnose, treat, cure, or prevent any disease.
Where we will spend a good majority of our summer. Where we will spend a good majority of our summer. Because the swampy VA summer has already begun (it’s in the low 90s today 🥵 lord help) and creeks are our retreat - not only from the heat but also from the noisy world. I need this just (if not more) than they do! We’ll be at the splash pads and pools too, but the quietness of the creek...my mental health is so about it. And it’s hours of play for them! Win win.  A couple things to note: this scene also included a few toddler reminders on finding another direction to throw rocks instead of at his brother - so not all is serene 🤪 and also, yes I am now that mom who buys the same clothing for both kids bc it keeps things simple & i think i kinda like it too 🤷🏻‍♀️
Things I love about midwifery among many: the appo Things I love about midwifery among many: the appointments, no matter how long, feel so unhurried. 
Just walked in from an appointment with my midwife because I was due for a Pap test + an overall wellness visit. My last pap was during my first trimester with Cal which feels like a jillion years ago, but it’s only actually been three years. Life changes so fast! Pre-baby life feels like a whole other life.  I’m wayyyy overdue for a visit to my PCP bc I’ve been under OBGYN or midwifery care for the majority of the past three years while having babies, but I am pretty good with keeping up with my paps. It seems women often think they need pap and/or HPV testing way more frequently than they do (and providers sometimes perform these tests more frequently than necessary - remember more testing doesn’t always mean better outcomes!)  So if you need it, here’s a quick little reminder on this chilly spring Friday afternoon on how often you need this testing (these are the recommendations from ACOG)  Women aged 21–29 years should have a Pap test alone every 3 years. HPV testing is not recommended.  Women aged 30–65 years should have a Pap test and an HPV test (aka co-testing) every 5 years (preferred). It also is acceptable to have a Pap test alone every 3 years.  If you get abnormal results, this testing frequency could change - but for healthy women with normal results, you actually don’t need testing as frequently as you might think. Which is great news for those of you who hate the speculum.  Ok, off to finish up some things on the to-do list (including cleaning this kitchen) during nap time and then come 5 o’clock, crack an IPA with our neighbors 🍻
#AlignPartner Over the past seven months since bec #AlignPartner Over the past seven months since becoming a mom of two, caring for myself has gotten shoved to the back burner. And it's been a challenge to make it a priority. My routine-resistant personality has upsides and downsides when it comes to motherhood. So I'm starting small this year with a consistent bedtime routine that includes taking my supplements and @alignprobiotic and hoping as that becomes consistent, my mornings will naturally shift too.  In short my bedtime currently goes like this….jammies & face care when putting the babies to bed. Before I go to bed (anytime between 9pm and 12am...) I’ll pump, take my supplements and fill my water. Then I go upstairs and brush my teeth. And then get in bed. The kicker: 70% of the time I find myself finishing up tasks on my phone IN BED. I hate this habit.  Back to supplements. This is something I have been able to stick with. On top of fish oil, my prenatal, choline and vitamin D, I recently added @AlignProbiotic 24/7 Digestive Support*§ to see if it helps with abdominal discomfort and regularity because when I don’t drink coffee or am traveling that can get thrown off.  I’ll be taking it every day for the next 28 days since it takes TIME for our bodies to adjust to probiotics - and I'll be taking you guys along with me as I share my honest thoughts. Many people think if they don’t see changes within the first 7-10 days then the probiotic isn’t working, but that’s not the case. I’m giving myself more than just a week or two and instead a full month to see the full benefits. I’ll keep you posted over the next month. Check out my stories to learn more! #MyAlignGutJourney #guthealth
 
*These statements have not been evaluated by the Food and Drug Administration. This product is not intended to diagnose, treat, cure, or prevent any disease.
We had an AFTERNOON today. Toddler didn’t care f We had an AFTERNOON today. Toddler didn’t care for a nap. Putting baby down was harder than I wanted it to be. Miraculously, I had a moment of clarity as I was covered in tiny humans and decided I wasn’t doing the nap battle thing a on 60 degree, gorgeous, sunny spring day 🙅🏻‍♀️ so I piled both babies into the car half naked, opened the sun roof, put on white noise for them and an audio book for me and drank a kombucha as I drove a meal to a postpartum mama. Thirty five minutes later we had a sleeping baby and a toddler who at least had a rest. Baby transferred without waking HALLELUJAH and although my toddler didn’t nap today (lord help) at least we got soaked in breezy sunshine 😎🤘🏻💆🏻‍♀️
We veered from our usual Friday night homemade piz We veered from our usual Friday night homemade pizza (minus the dough, we leave that to @albemarlebakingco) because we are eating pizza tomorrow with some friends - instead I called my mom and asked her how she makes her chicken fingers and we fried up a big ole batch of chicken nugs 🙌🏻🤤 along with a sheet pan full of sweet potato fries and a simple arugula salad dressed with parmesean, olive oil and s&p. Oh and my moms honey mustard recipe for dipping. It’s SO DANG GOOD.  Over the past 6ish months we’ve been practicing (and practicing and practicing bc it doesn’t come naturally) unplugging from technology and slowing down and resting and just being for one day a week. Some call it Shabbat. Some call it Sabbath. Maybe you call it something different. All I know is IT IS SO GOOD FOR MY WEARY SOUL and the day I look forward to ALL WEEK. Sundown on Friday to sundown Saturday. Nothing but rest. For us that means hiking (or something outside) and napping and reading and being with friends and eating really good food. And drinking some really good wine or craft beer. Sometimes whiskey. 😛  And because I know I’ll get asked about the chicken finger recipe and also because it’s too good not to share and Momma Coale said I could, here ya go:  Cut chicken breast into thin strips or small pieces (I prefer nug size bc the breading to chicken ratio is perfection). Salt and pepper those babies really well. Then dredge them in all purpose flour, then egg, then panko - just like you would bread anything else. Then fry them up in a light oil - I use avocado oil because that’s our everyday oil. You could also use canola or peanut oil. Just fill a pan with an inch or so of oil on medium high heat. They only take 2-3 minutes per side. You can always temp them to make sure they are at least 165 degrees F to really make sure they are done. Dunk in all the sauces and enjoy!  Happy weekend!

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