1. Normal eating vs Intuitive Eating
When Simi and Alexis visited a few weeks ago, we got into a really good conversation on our drive up to Portland on the difference between intuitive eating and normal eating. When I stop to think about how I make food choices, I have to really try to remember because at this point it’s automatic — subconscious might be a better word. As we were talking I was internally and externally processing and realized that “ohhhhhhh, this is what I’m trying to explain.” I think the journey to finding peace with food goes from eating disorder/disordered eating/dieting –> intuitive eating —> normal eating. Intuitive eating is the bridge to becoming just a normal eater. It can take time to build up the skills to becoming a normal eater again (before diet culture got in the way) and building back trust with your body. A long time. Like years. So if this process feels slow to you, that’s how it’s suppose to feel. In the beginning of my journey to finding peace with food I did have to work through questions like, “What do I feel like eating right now?” “Is this what I want to eat or what I think I should eat?” “How will this make me feel physically?” “Am I satisfied?”
I feel like over the past couple years I’ve transitioned to normal eating where I don’t really put that much thought into food. If I get too full, I know it will pass, I think about slowing down or being more mindful next time and move on. If I want to eat ice cream at night, I eat it. As I’ve built more and more body trust (and as you will too) I’ve learned that the body is quite resilient when I’m not micromanaging my weight/body size. I don’t have to have intuitive/mindful eating experiences 100% of the time for my body to regulate its weight. I never ever thought I’d get to a point where I wouldn’t feel crazy around brownies (or insert any food that applies to you here) or be able to think to myself, “actually I don’t want a brownie right now” and as I was thinking about normal eating I realized that just isn’t a thing anymore. So if you’re in your journey or maybe contemplating quitting dieting/disordered eating or beginning recovery from an eating disorder….know that you’re right where you need to be in your own process. And know that becoming a normal eater can be years in the making. YEARS. I hope this space continues to be an encouraging, safe place for you throughout your journey.
2. DIY Delicious Popsicles
A while back, I shared that I wanted to make these popsicles at the beginning of the summer. I bought a popsicle mold (this one if you’re interested) back in the spring and so far just make my usual greek yogurt pops using ~2 cups whole milk yogurt, ~2 cups of frozen blueberries and ~1/4 cup of liquid sweetener (maple syrup, honey, simple syrup). But I wanted to change it up! The banana popsicles I wanted to make look amazing and so pretty, but I knew I needed a lazier version. So I blended up frozen bananas, some peanut flour that was sent to me, a few spoonfuls of pb, and a few healthy squirts of chocolate syrup. Then I stirred in some chocolate chips and poured the blended mixture into the molds. Side note on peanut flour —> this is not a substitute for regular peanut butter. It will not give you the same amount of satiation as peanut butter because it lacks the smooth creamy texture (if you try to add liquid to make it like pb) and fat content of regular peanut butter. I do like the strong peanut flavor the flour gives to the pops and I like to bake with this stuff, but mixing the powder with water and making “peanut butter” is not a thing in my mind. That’s diet food. Not satiating, satisfying food that is good for my body. Back to the popsicles. These popsicles are awesome and I highly recommend! I’ve been eating them as an afternoon snack and loving it. Cold + creamy + satisfying.
3. My first local wedding
Our good friends from the New York City days (who happen to now live a few blocks from us in Boston) got married this past weekend. Living in New York for 4 years when many friends got married meant I traveled for a lot of weddings. New York friends that get married rarely get married in New York (at least my friends didn’t, but some do!) so weddings always meant a travel weekend – which I loved since I got to visit a lot of really cool places. But man, it’s so nice not to travel for a wedding. These friends were married at a venue on the North Shore – which is about 40 minutes north of Boston. The rehearsal dinner was Thursday, wedding Friday and then we hung out with friends that were in town all day Saturday. It was such a fun weekend and it was really nice to be able to sleep in my own bed each night.
Best thing I ate all weekend were these bacon wrapped dates that had a tangy dipping sauce, I think I ate like 16 at the cocktail hour, and these little maple honey fried chicken things. SO GOOD. I could live off bacon wrapped dates alone. Anyone else?!
4. I feel like a gym hypocrite…
Kind of but not really. A couple months ago, I wrote about how not having a gym membership, for me, has been really helpful and I’ve enjoyed movement so much more since not having a membership. For the first trimester I walked a lot because the fresh spring air really helped with my nausea and every other type of movement felt blah. I was uninterested. So I mostly walked, maybe did a few walk/jogs and the occasional 30 minute barre3 online class. Running was OUT. For me it felt unnatural. Yoga (which I had previously been loving) was a no because the thought of being in a warm room (this wasn’t hot yoga but the room is still semi-warm) without fresh air made me want to vom. So I would go on a walk usually in the afternoon/evening and listen to a podcast, walking until it was over. But then I started to develop pubic bone pain after walking where it felt like somebody had kicked me in my groin. Not cute and not comfy. My OB told me everything is looser down there and even if it feels good in the moment to be walking, it was the impact of the walking that was making my crotch feel bruised –> that’s the best way I can describe it, I’m not sure if anyone else has experienced this? Probably..
Moving my body really helped me feel better physically, mentally and emotionally so I knew I wanted to keep doing that. But walking more than 15 minutes at a time resulted in pain, and even though I love barre3 online, I get easily bored doing videos in our apartment. So I’ve been riding the bike or getting in the pool or doing some light weights or doing a barre3 video in the group exercise room when I go to the gym and that has felt really good and kept me feeling good. I’m just trying to listen to my body, move when/how it feels good and nap/rest when that’s what I need. This pelvic pain happened only a couple weeks after I wrote about how I was enjoying not having a gym membership and then I felt like a hypocrite!! So here I am telling you not because you care or because it matters, but because it’s making me feel better so thanks for reading…lol. I was kind of worried I’d run into a reader since that sometimes happens and they’d be like, “she’s a liar!!” My goal is to be as authentic as possible 🙂 Hopefully, I’ll be able to get back outside doing things early next spring, but for now the gym (especially the pool) is working well in this season of life.
5. Next up on my baking list
These brown sugar chocolate chip cookies. How chewy and buttery and absolutely perfect do they look?! I know you can never go wrong with the recipe on the back of the chocolate chip bag, but something (or everything) about this recipe is calling me.
Those are my thoughts. Share yours in the comments and have a great week!